Rules of Engagement

It starts with her beauty in my eyes, it moves...

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My Pet and I began this journey as a solution to our waning sex life and other issues that were plaguing our otherwise normal marital relationship. We were going on about our lives, never really noticing that important things, like open and (truly) honest communication, were disappearing from our marriage.

Sure, we spoke, but I often felt like I couldn’t honestly say what was on my mind without him getting defensive and/or getting immaturely moody, after the fact.

Sure, our sex life was “o-kay”, but it was the same time, same place, every week and most weeks, I dreaded it. Even the way we would get into foreplay became so routine that often I would lay there for a set amount of time and then beg him to go down on me, or I would go down on him. The nights when I wouldn’t even bother with that move, he would finger me for a bit and then stick his penis inside me, hump for five or ten minutes, then roll over and go to sleep. Never once in those episodes did he ever seek to see if I was pleased with how things were going and eventually I grew weary of trying to explain to him why I was not happy sexually. It was actually a lot like having sex with a 16 year old boy; a young man who is so excited about sex, but who hasn’t a clue about what he’s doing or how to please his partner for their sake, not his own.

Giving credit where credit is definitely due, My Pet has always given good Face and so I excused his mediocre foreplay and coitus skills for longer than I should have.

But, the day came when I just couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t take one more night of mediocre sex. One more night of telling him “that hurts” or “that’s not it” and having him give up and pull out a toy rather than try harder to touch me properly. I could not take one more night of “not bad” cunnilingus and mediocre intercourse (he’s got problems keeping an erection once he’s had an orgasm, and he cums WAY too fast, so that meant I HAD to get mine, before he got his and if I didn’t, he’d be asleep before I could even think about asking for more) and missing out on having the Big O that I truly desired.

So, I went on strike. I told him all about it, before I did. I told him that something needs to change in our bedroom, or we are through, as lovers.

As expected, he got mad, he got angry. He said that I was asking for too much. He cried and begged for me to change my mind. I refused. I insisted he get help; go see a doctor, do some research. He stayed made for a week and then I turned him on to female-led relationships and loving female authority.

He was very open to the idea, but still very reluctant as I would find in the weeks ahead. I took over the leadership of our marriage inside and outside of the bedroom.

I began by reintroducing affection into our marriage. I made it a rule that, no matter my mood, or his mood, he had to give me a kiss whenever he left/returned to a facility where we were staying together, whether that be our bedroom, our home, the store, or a friend’s home. This helped endear him to me, and likewise, me to him, as I now get very excited to see him because I know that he’s going to kiss me the second he approaches me, even in front of my boss/coworkers/friends. He even kisses me before/after he goes to walk the fur-babies.

I speak my mind, tactfully, but without regard to whether or not it will hurt his feelings to hear bad news. If I think something needs to be changed about his appearance, his scent, or something else he is doing that annoys me or displeases me, I no longer play the diplomat like I have in the past, I tell it like it is and save the apologies for his bruised ego for another day. That has made our communications truly honest and this allows him to open up and ask for suggestions that I freely offer, or allow him to do research to improve in the areas that he has the most problems with. This makes me hotter for him because I can see him slowly improving, every day, to the point where my complaints are less and his reception to correction is more compliant.

I make him ask for everything, including kisses, if they are not explicitly expected. He asks if he can go to the bathroom or if he can fix dinner. He even asks if he can get ready for work. The list is not limited. He asked and usually, I say “yes”. I am learning to say “no”, more often, in the interest of discipline, but this is an issue that I am working on improving.

I make/allow him to do everything for me, with the exception of hygienic issues, but even then, I allow him to bathe me when he draws me a bubble bath. He cooks every meal and cleans every room. He washes, folds, and stores the laundry. He does all the grocery shopping, he’s even responsible for the grocery list. If I suddenly get a desire for something that needs to be purchased, I send him to get it, even if it’s tampons. When I tell him to jump to do anything, he lovingly asks, “How high?”

I make him kiss my feet during Play Time and I make him put my shoes on my feet, every day, and kiss them before and after he does. I never think much about him taking off my shoes after work and kissing my feet, but that soon will change. I just love how it makes me feel during Play Time, but even better is the memories it evokes when he kisses my feet outside of that. I feel so much sexier throughout a normal day, thinking about his kissing my feet and how much fun we have naked, while I’m at work handling normal, mundane work tasks. I’ve been told that I look happier, these days, too. Must be the constant smile I have on my face daydreaming about our next Play Time.

In our sex life, I now direct the foreplay and tell him exactly how to kiss me and where. I tell him how to touch me and make sure that his hands and nails are trimmed, so he doesn’t scratch me when he touches me. This is an ongoing issue that still needs work.

Our foreplay is now a little rougher and a lot hotter than it ever was because we have a rule that I am required to have no less than five orgasms and The Big O before we are done. This has made him far more creative and less threatened by my array of vibrators and dildos that I keep around our love nest.

We now have sex more often. I let him sleep a few hours after he gets home from work and then before dinner (or breakfast on our mutual days off) I wake him up for Play Time. Some days I even get ten orgasms or more between dawn and sunset. And, it no longer matters what time of the month it is, either.

I continue to restrict his access to coitus, although every once in a while I do allow him to have sex with me, but ONLY after I’ve gotten mine several times. In place of intercourse, I usually allow him to masturbate for me or I help masturbate him with a vibe against his scrotum.

We’ve discussed the little blue pills (and other pills for ED), but those things cost money that we just don’t have. So, instead, we are going to invest in a penis extender that also doubles as a male sex toy so that I can have as much intercourse as I need to be sexually satisfied and so that I can tease and satisfy him when I am done getting mine.

In due time, we will add a few more aspects to our Play Time including spanking and pegging. I love how excited he gets when we discuss it.

Our entire relationship has improved ten-fold. We are excited to see each other, again, after we’ve been apart and we are both excited for Play Time in a way we have never been before. I can’t believe that we didn’t think of this before, but now that we are here, we have no intention of going back.

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